Saturday, June 23, 2007
Help me in this mass of chaos..
I feel like such a waste of life. I'm not sure what to do. Theres a chance of me actually getting a job..but I'm not sure whether or not to take it if the chance does in fact happen. Reason why? My sister just had her baby on...*thinks* Thursday. And today I go and visit and all I hear is stuff about babysitting when Yadira[my sister] has to go back to work. Which I don't know..maybe I feel that it then should be my responsibilty to try and care of him after school. But then whats the point of getting a job and quitting after a month or so. I'd want to keep it and have it hopefully working with my school schedule. On top of that my aunt started talking to me about college. And of course she's freaking me out when I tell her I don't have a definite career path. I get scared at the thought of college...because its then a clear slap in the face to "grow up". And I'm not sure I want to--yet. Then of course I panic at the thought of not having 8 AP projects completed. I'm still not finished with one....Mana will/must look perfect! Of course, he's only starting to get prettier from that once blob that I had..And I haven't been able to work on any of my future cosplays ;-; I think I'm going to take a day off tomorrow and go to the fashion district or something and buy some vinyl, at least to start making the armwarmers. Those alone are a bitch to make. Oh well I'm off.
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3 comments:
1. a job's a job, any money is better than no money...and if they like you and you have to leave for a reason, they might always rehire you when needed.2. You're not a waste of life.3. Despite babysitting, your family also seems to stress on your path of growing up so maybe you should kind of throw back their words into their faces. Its your senior year, you're going to busy enough if they want you to get a job, then you shouldn't have to babysit often, otherwise if they complain about how you spend money wrecklessly they should pay You for babysitting because that's Technically a job.4. If you really need help sewing, I don't mind helping.5. Don't fall into the deathtrap of adults freaking you out about college like I did. It creates nothing but pointless stress, fear, and paranoia that doesn't help at all. I know you already know what your interests are or at least partially have an idea. If you're that worried just choose a college with many options and not one of those that mainly specializes in one major and nothing else. Otherwise even colleges themselves don't mind if you have a major or not once you enter. It's good enough to just have a specific interest of yours to hang around you but its fine if you're not sure about what you want to do yet. You have about 3 more years to be sure. First 2 years of colleges is mainly required classes and a few electives to get you in some path of interest. The majority of teenagers that have a "major" during their senior year in college rarely stick to it because they later find out its not right for them so don't feel like you're lost because you're not the only one. It's just people get all worked up about being all sure about things even though they're really not. Don't worry about what you're going to do yet, these things take time and colleges expect you to explore this once you're IN college not before it necessarily.It's going to be a consecutive path of being slapped in the face to grow up for the next 5 years. It's a natural process..don't think too much of it...and no choice of yours is permanent so you can always change them.
I know how you feel. I had Veronica yelling at meh cuz I dunno what I want to do yet. And she's all like "College-blah-blha-blah" I dunno I pretty much zoned out on purpose when she was talking. heh
...-_-; you still have a year to decide..
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